The festive season is just behind us, that time of year when we catch up with family, have a good time, eat too much, sink a few ales and tell whatever tall stories we think we can get away with.
It’s also time to tape up some tennis balls, find the battered Gray Nic we haven’t seen for 12months, water the concrete pitch just short of a length, enlist the garbage bin as a rather malodorous wicket, and try to remember the local rules that caused so many arguments last year.
That’s right, it’s time for the backyard cricket match, where sons do their best to take down their fathers, while fathers cling on to their imagined paternal supremacy for just one more year.
Just to make it more interesting this year, I’m proposing a fantasy match where 11 Test-playing fathers are pitted against their Test-playing sons, and the selector’s challenge here is to come up with two balanced and competitive sides. Here are the teams to take to the field, in batting order.
Fathers XI
1. Geoff Marsh, Australia: 50 Tests, 2854 runs at 33.18 including four centuries and 15 fifties
A no-frills opener who valued his wicket.
2. Nazar Mohammad, Pakistan: five Tests, 277 runs at 39.57 including one century and one fifty
He was the first Pakistani batsman to face a ball in Test cricket and the first player in Test cricket to be on the field for an entire match. His career was ended prematurely due to a domestic accident. He was the father of Mudassar Nazar.
3. Walter Hadlee, New Zealand: 11 Tests, 543 runs at 30.16 including one century and two fifties
An attacking batsman who had limited Test opportunities, but was a prolific run-scorer in first class cricket.
4. Everton Weekes, West Indies: 48 Tests, 4455 runs at 58.61 including 15 centuries and 19 fifties.
An absolute gun with the willow in hand.
5. Shivnarine Chanderpaul, West Indies: 164 Tests, an incredible 11,867 runs at 51.37, including 30 centuries and 66 fifties.
Highly unorthodox, and not one for the text books, but one of the greatest batsmen of the modern game.
6. Hanif Mohammad (wk), Pakistan: 55 Tests, 3915 runs at 43.98 with 12 centuries and 15 fifties, and an excellent wicket-keeper
Surely the only player to be run out for 499 in a first class game, and once he batted for 970 minutes to score 337 in a Test against the West Indies.
7. Chris Broad, England: 25 Tests, 1661 runs at 39.54 with six centuries and six fifties
Normally an opener, he gets the chance to bat down the order and build some partnerships with the string of all-rounders to follow.
8. Peter Pollock, South Africa: 28 Tests, 116 wickets at 24.18 and 607 runs at 21.67
A top-level fast bowler who had his international career cut short at the age of 29 as a result of the Apartheid sporting boycott.
9. Lance Cairns, New Zealand: 43 Tests, 130 wickets at 32.92 and 928 runs at 16.28
A swing bowler who was awkward to face and a prolific six-hitter batting down the order.
10. Lala Amarnath, India: 24 Tests, 45 wickets at 32.91 and 878 runs at 24.38, including a century and four fifties. Good swing bowler, hard-hitting batsman and could also take the gloves if required.
11. Jeff Jones, England: 15 Tests, 44 wickets at 40.20
Left-arm quick and specialist No.11 bat who took over 500 wickets at first class level.
Sons XI
1. Tagenarine Chanderpaul, West Indies, two Tests, 160 runs at 40
An impressive player just beginning his Test career.
(Photo by James Worsfold/Getty Images)
2. Mudassar Naza, Pakistan: 76 Tests, 4114 runs at 38.09 including 10 centuries and 17 fifties
Mudassar was a batsman with a very good defence who valued his wicket, and a very handy medium-pace bowler, taking 66 Test wickets at 38.36. Son of Nazar Mohammad.
3. Shoiab Mohammad, Pakistan: 45 Tests, 2705 runs at 44.34 with seven centuries and 13 fifties
Son of Hanif Mohammad, Shoiab was a batsman with a limited range of shots but was very hard to dismiss.
4. Mohinder Amarnath, India: 69 Tests, 4378 runs at 42.50 and 32 wickets at 55.68
A very good batsman, particularly against pace, who scored 11 centuries and 24 fifties. Handy medium-pace change bowler as well.
5. Chris Cairns, New Zealand: 62 Tests, 3,320 runs at 33.53 including five centuries and 22 fifties, and 218 wickets at 29.40
One of the best all-rounders in the game in the 1990s.
6. Shaun Pollock, South Africa: 108 Tests, 421 wickets at 23.11 and 3881 runs at 32.31
A wonderful all-rounder who bowled fast and knew how to hold a bat.
7. Richard Hadlee, New Zealand: 86 Tests, 431 wickets at 22.29 and 3124 runs at 27.16 including two centuries and 15 fifties
A superb fast bowler and great competitor who could also make big contributions with the bat.
Richard Hadlee (Simon Bruty /Allsport)
8. David Murray (wk), West Indies: 19 Tests, 62 dismissals and 601 runs at 21.46
A talented keeper who was more than handy with the bat. David Murray is the son of Everton Weekes.
9. Mitchell Marsh, Australia: 32 Tests, 42 wickets at 38.64, 1260 runs at 25.20 including two centuries and three fifties
An all-rounder who just needed to swap his batting and bowling averages in order to make a real impact.
10. Stuart Broad, England: 159 Tests (and counting), 566 wickets at 27.77, and 3550 runs at 18.39 including one century and 13 fifties
A great competitor who has proved himself to be one of the best fast bowlers in the world since making his debut in 2007.
11. Simon Jones, England: 18 Tests, 59 wickets at 28.23 and 205 runs at 15.76
A right-arm fast bowler who could get the ball to swing.
So, there they are, a team of talented fathers and their opposition team comprising their equally talented sons. Not everyone will be happy with the selections, though.
Chris Broad only makes the Fathers team in order to fit son Stuart into the opposition, and Len Hutton, George Headley and Colin Cowdrey miss out as their sons Richard Hutton, Ron Headley and Chris Cowdrey hardly demand selection in the Sons XI.
Other father and son combinations not selected are India’s Vijay and Sanjay Manjrekar, the Nawab of Pataudi and his son Mansur, and Roger and Stuart Binny. Pakistan’s Moin Khan and his son Azar were also overlooked, as was the English father and son combination of David Bairstow and his son Jonny.
So, who wins?
The Fathers XI have a solid top order, the prospect of big scores from Weekes, Chanderpaul, and Hanif Mohammad in the middle order, and bat very deep with only No.11 Jeff Jones a genuine batting bunny. From a bowling perspective, a big burden will fall on the shoulders of the inimitable Peter Pollock, with the rest of the medium pace bowling attack of Jones, Cairns and Amarnath nowhere near his class.
The Sons XI batting looks rather thin, with only a handful of front-line batsmen in Chanderpaul, Nazar, Mohammad and Amarnath, but they have a wealth of all-rounders, and could expect some useful contributions to the total from the likes of Cairns, Pollock, Murray, Hadlee and Marsh.
They have a strong bowling attack, with new ball specialists in Pollock, Hadlee, Broad and Jones well supported by the likes of Nazar, Amarnath, Cairns and Marsh. Neither team has anyone even vaguely resembling a specialist spin bowler.
The Sons XI look like winners to me, primarily on the strength of their superior bowling attack.
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